I Tried to Learn Nothing Yesterday

"Today for Show and Tell, I've brought a tiny marvel of nature: a single snowflake. I think we might all learn a lesson from how this utterly unique and exquisite crystal turns into an ordinary, boring molecule of water, just like every other one, when you bring it in the classroom. And now, while the analogy sinks in, I'll be leaving you drips and going outside."
--Calvin, from Calvin & Hobbes

I nabbed this most insightful quote from a kick-*ss blog written by a kick-*ss unschooler. (Thanks Heart-Rockin' Mama!)Yesterday was Learn Nothing Day, a holiday created by Sandra and Holly Dodd to poke a little fun at those folks who ask us questions like, "But if you don't go to school, how do you learn?"We've gotten that comment, mostly from kids. The adults are a bit more discerning in their questioning, asking if we worry about college or how we learn about physics or what our days look like because they could never "stand to be home with their kids" every day. It's ok, it's normal to misunderstand something that's out of your realm of experience, but to unschoolers, who operate on the belief that learning happens all the time - ALL*THE*TIME - it does, truthfully, get a little tiresome after a while.

I'd forgotten to warn my kids ahead of time that Learn Nothing Day was approaching. It's only the 2nd annual and I didn't pay much attention to it last year. This year, however, I told Jonathan about it over breakfast. His reply? "I wish I'd known this sooner, so I could've planned better."

He has a whole pile of new birthday gifts so there's no WAY he won't learn anything today. But then we laughed about how we were learning something while we discussed not learning anything. And then we learned how hard it is to try to learn nothing. Doh!

His school friend summed up our point nicely by chiming in, "I try not to really learn anything during summer break" with a shrug. What he means, of course, is that he doesn't do anything schooly - no reading of textbooks, no writing of reports after reading a good book, no creating a diorama to explain that cool documentary you just watched. And therein lies one of my biggest beefs with the way school operates. Schools would have us believe that learning happens only when you are being taught by someone else. They'd also have us believe that it's "work" and "a kid's job" and "very serious" and other such sobering things. And in school - it is, usually. Even the younger grades get less and less fun as the push for higher test scores and earlier reading takes over.

But kids are learning all the time - ALL*THE*TIME - in AND out of school. They're learning even when they're seemingly "doing nothing" because, honestly, it's impossible to do nothing.

What unschoolers have captured is the beautiful realization that learning isn't separate from living. That in the process of living, learning happens. ALL*THE*TIME. When you're preparing for a birthday party, you're learning. When you're reading, watching tv, playing a video game you're learning. You're even learning as you rest or watch clouds drift by or sun yourself on the beach. It's impossible to not learn.

Humans are hard-wired to learn from their surroundings, but it helps if one is interested, motivated, and inspired. And this is where school does a really sh*t job. And before you give me over to the teachers' unions for a lashing in the public square, listen - I WAS a public school teacher and I KNOW how teachers' hands are tied (to a certain extent). What would be really beautiful is if a whole bunch of school personnel rose up and said, "we're tired of this drudgery!" and started interacting - really interacting, on a level that isn't "I say - you do" - with the kids. Then watch the students' eyes light up and let the revolution begin.

I know, I know. DUDE - WHAT AM I SMOKING?

But seriously, people - we've got to stop operating under the assumption that kids won't learn if they aren't forced, coerced, prodded, and locked into a damn brick building for 7 hours of every day, 180 days a year. It's ludicrous. And we also have to stop believing that the only important things one learns are what's taught within school walls.

When talking with Jonathan's school friend today, we used the example of his juggling. He's an expert juggler for his age and he spends a lot of time researching technique, watching pros on youtube, finding the right equipment, practicing, and even choreographing new and unique rhythms. "Just think how much you learn about juggling all the time!" I pointed out, and we talked about how learning isn't something one only does at school. He does learn at school, and he's an excellent student, but that's one way to learn among many. He seemed happy at that notion, that he learns at school but he learns in other ways at other times and in other places as well, and it's not always stressful or boring or difficult.

And as for the whole "what about college" thing (or what about physics or writing term papers or learning to meet assignment deadlines or "insert stereotypical worry here"), unschooling doesn't mean you just give everything over to the universe and say "what will be, will be!" and then dance off into the sunset with your dreadlocks swaying and leaving a trail of incense behind. You do what anyone would do who wants to get into college (or take a physics class or write a paper or meet a deadline) - you prepare. Unschoolers don't learn little bits of this and that in separated-out morsels in preparation of possibly "someday" needing that information. They follow their interests and tackle their goals and learn what they need to learn as they go. And it works.

And it works on a radically different timeline from school, too. Just because state mandates say that fourth graders learn to long-divide, it doesn't mean there's some innate need to learn to long-divide at age 9. No one needs to long-divide until they need to long-divide. Not sooner, not later. And when one needs to know something, one typically goes about learning it.

Adults have a difficult time wrapping their heads around this. But usually those fears also stem from the worry that their child will be too different from other kids, or they'll appear to be neglectful parents. It's easier to follow the herd. I totally get that. That's why you'll see unschoolers hugging and jumping up and down in glee when they get together - SOMEONE LIKE ME! It ain't easy to paddle against the current, lemme tell ya.

But what it comes down to is this: What do I care about more, my child's freedom and well-being and happiness? or the nosy lady's misinformed opinion at the local mini-mart?

No contest.

Paddling upstream gets easier. I tried to learn nothing yesterday. I gave it a really good go. I was so tired from hosting 4 parties in 6 days that I sat on my butt almost all day, sorting through digital photos (oops, I learned how to use flickr), blogging (oops, I used an online thesaurus to choose some words), reading magazines (oops, I flagged several recipes and art activity ideas), and eating (oops, I learned that grazing on leftover party food all day makes me a bit queasy *BURP*).

I challenge you to learn nothing for one day. And then, the next time you wonder about us wacky weirdo unschoolers, perhaps you'll pause and think.... "You just might have something there...."

Source: I nabbed this article and quote from another awesome, unschooling, blogging mama, Piscesgrrl. Thought it timely with the approach of the traditional school year.

Will Post for Food

Reconciling Homeschooling Realities and Entrepreneurial Endeavors with Semi-Random Creative Verve Melted on Top: All of This & More in Just One Blog!

This was one of the suggested names that came as a result of my Name Change Poll. I have to admit; it does ring true...don't you think? I've decided to add the "Will Post for Food" part to the blog title permanently but to otherwise leave the title as it is. Raves & Rants of a Homeschool Mom: Will Post for Food. Thanks for participating in the poll! Fun one.

So, the first post of a new month. I love the beginning of the month. The monthly bulletin board of images has to be updated, and this month, I am focusing solely on Memorial Day; though I do acknowledge all of the other cultural Holidays and celebrations this month.

Happy...

Polski Day!

Cinco de Mayo!

Armed Forces Day!

Grandma Yadrich's Birthday!

New Grandma's Birthday!

Mother's Day!

Old Grandma's (my Mother) Birthday!
Memorial Day!

Asian-Pacific American Month!

Physical Fitness Month!

...and whatever other honorable holidays I MAY have missed!

The beginning of the month is also a time of reflection of the month past and in looking ahead to all of the wonderful things we will experience in the days to come.

Last month, Doug shot his first turkey. He was so excited, and Cole and I are so proud. He also brought home a bunch of morels, which we were quick to wash up, fry up, and eat up! Our chef buddy and Doug cleaned up the bird, and the amazing-looking meat is in the fridge, waiting to be cooked this weekend.

We had a lovely time with our extended family for Grandma Beasley's birthday in April and then again for Easter - when we also met our new little cousin, Whitney. She is a little angel and surely gets it from her Daddy.

Cole wrapped up his second month of guitar lessons last month and is really enjoying spending time with our friend, Danny. He's not much into practicing his guitar yet, and though he gets nervous before each lesson due to his lack of practice, he is not so moved as to change his behavior at this point. I remember starting band at his age, and learning to read - let alone play- music was intimidating and completely alien at first. One of these days, the light bulb will turn on, and he'll "get it" and be on his rockin' way.

My marketing firm, Innovative Design & Marketing LLC, picked up two new clients in April. Each new client heard its own little whoop of joy from me as in this economy, simply maintaining clients is a challenge. I also picked up two coaching clients - one seeking career coaching, the other adult ADHD coaching.

All in all, April was a GREAT month!

This May is a particularly exciting month for our household as it marks the conclusion of our first year as homeschoolers!

After two and a half weeks in public school at the onset of the 2008-09 school year, we decided enough was enough and removed Cole from school. Our decision was based on a culmination of previous and consistent disappointments within a variety of institutionalized education systems - both public and private - and was one of the single best decisions we've ever made for Cole and for our family.

The emotional rush of anger with our local public school combined with the positive energy in a dream realized in being able to finally homeschool Cole propelled us head-on into our homeschooling experience. The decision was made within a 30 second exchange in the school office, and we never looked back, nor did Cole (or us) suffer any negative transition - primarily because we had been wishful for the opportunity to educate Cole in this way for the past four years (and Cole was stoked we'd rescued him).

Cole now is learning in an organic, natural, and passion-driven fashion. We don't have bedtimes or set alarm clocks to wake by (well, we do if I'm traveling), but we don't sit around and talk about iCarly all day....lol..well, okay - we some times we do. Mostly, we are a family think tank driven by and intertwined by our three individual interests (respectively) and by all of the other stuff going on around us - what we see, hear, taste, smell, feel, and think about on a daily basis. We are all very project driven, and if you walked into our dining room, the piles on the table in front of you are a hint at what we are currently immersed.

Another bonus in homeschooling - and a timely topic with the swine flu epidemic: Cole's last full year in school had him down with strep SIX times. This meant six rounds of antibiotics (at least), never-ending make-up work and feeling behind, negative attitudes from the staff who felt we exaggerated the extent of Cole's illnesses, and so on. Within the past twelve months, Cole has had strep ZERO times (knock on wood)...a truly amazing feat when you've dealt with the school year unwellness blues we have.

In summary, we love unschooling!

Soooo...back to it being the first of the month. Yet another reason I love the first of any month are the new magazine subscriptions that begin to arrive in my mail box. This is one of my few green-guilty pleasures, but I do oh-so love my magazines (I also do try to make sure to pick up half of my monthly mags from the local library's donation box.) The latest, greatest from Scientific America, National Geographic, Inc., Fast Company, Entrepreneur, Harper's, the New Yorker, the Humanist, and many, many more. Cole digs into Highlights, Hot Rod, and NatGeo. Some of my favorite evenings are spent sitting around discussing the articles we're all respectively getting into, interrupting each other to read a bit out loud here and there. Awesome!

Beginnings are always so exciting! : )

Here are a few projects we are working on this May.

Windowsill Herb Garden: Here are a couple of photos of Cole planting basil seeds.

We are attempting basil, mint, parsley, cilantro, and maybe a couple of others. All of our dreams involve moving to the Country, and in hopeful preparation, we thought we'd better brush up on growing things.

Cole has also been diligently tracking the many storms that have passed through, and we are discussing creating a weather center in Cole's den. For sure, the kiddo needs a Farmer's Almanac. They are expensive, so we'll have to start budgeting it in. Cole is obsessed with comparing the historical daily highs and lows to current temperature trends. We do a lot of research on global warming, droughts, flooding, etc. Bottom line, this kid is cuckoo for weather.

I found an old airplane kit while digging for dirty laundry in Cole's room the other day. Cole and Doug spent an afternoon working on different models, making adjustments based on their objectives - straight, fast flying plans, loop-de-loo planes, hover planes, etc. It was a wonderful afternoon of flight and physics.

Cole, Doug, and I are also working on a philanthropic project this month. A friend of mine from high school/college, Jackie (Smith) Malena, is battling hepatacelluar carcinoma - a rare cancer of the liver - and is in need of additional funds to continue her treatment. This is Jackie's 2nd occurrence of cancer in seven years, and as you can imagine, their family's savings have been exhausted.

We are volunteering at their May 22nd Fun Run fund-raising event in Liberty and are also utilizing Fun & Funky Finds (my company's web store) as a means to help raise funds for Jackie's cancer treatment fund. 100% of the proceeds from Jackie's page are being donated to the fund.

If you are looking for a gift for Mother's Day, Graduation, a wedding, birthday, or any other special occasion, please take a second to consider supporting cancer warrior, Jackie Malena at Fun & Funky Finds.

Cole and I are also working on Mother's Day-related art projects, which we simply cannot disclose at this time. : ) Photos to follow soon.

I'm behind in my blogging. Several blog posts are in draft-form, and I'm determined to get them finished and posted before the pool opens....or it'll never happen.

Don't forget to check The Cole Train - Cole's weekly blog quote, and as always, thanks for your comments and for your continued support in our unschooling endeavor!

xo, Diane

Schedules and Lists and Things

Funny things happen when you begin to take away the structure from a previously-over-structured kid. I don't think I would have ever been able to grasp just how programmed my child is/was - that is, until we began homeschooling. It also hadn't occurred to me that Cole has been picking up my organizational habits and methods his entire life, and more pertinently, since he's been home with me, working, almost every day.

When we made the decision to pull Cole out of school, I knew I wanted to pursue a classical ("trivium") method of homeschooling combined with an unschooling environment. I spoke to experienced homeschooling parents and hung out with their families. I liked what I saw - open, loving, intelligent and engaged families. Four months later, this is still my ultimate goal.

Though I know it will realistically take years to achieve, I hope to provide a true unschooling environment for Cole with rich and diverse resources, activities, and groups available to him. I know in my heart this is the key to his success and joy in learning. There have been glimpses of it from the beginning. So, I'm starting to relax into our new life, and this new calm gave me the courage to begin loosening the reigns in Cole's daily schedule and giving him the opportunity to naturally discover learning situations throughout the day or an opportunity to create them to his liking as the ever-nagging boredom monkey on his back dictates.

I wasn't quite sure what our days would bring, but I knew Cole would be excited by the freedom, and I was excited by the new lesson in self-direction and responsibility Cole would find in occupying his time productively. For six long years, someone else has always told him what to do and when to do it without bothering with the why to do it, necessarily. This was going to be a tremendous change. When I told Cole of my idea, he was, as expected, very happy and proud to be trusted with this almost incomprehensible freedom. What would happen the following day, I could never have guessed.

.....

The next day found me up early working at the computer as usual. Cole lumbered out of bed, mumbled a good morning, and plopped himself down on the couch. I replied and kept working away. I was in the dining room, and I could see the top of Cole's head just above the couch in the living room. He was so quiet and hadn't moved; I assumed he fell back asleep as often happens during the week. So, I kept working.

Pretty soon, I was startled by Cole jumping up abruptly to make his way over to me. He was carrying a spiral notebook and pen, and I realized about half way through Cole's trip from the living room to me that he was describing the schedule he had just worked up for himself for the week!

SCHEDULE! Schedule?!

really? Hadn't I JUST abolished this idea of restrictive and prescribed learning? I thought I'd liberated us both from constraints and deadlines, but alas, after covering the 20 short feet from the living room to the dining room, the kiddo had reinstated...The Schedule. LOL.

At least it was a schedule to HIS liking, and being the overly-organized person I am, I smiled proudly at the little man for his wisdom in planning out his day. It may have been scheduled learning, but it was still his day filled with his choices. And, how smart to plan to have all of your studies done just in time for your friends to be home from school? I believe Cole was so excited by his new control; he expressed his joy in meticulously rendering this detailed agenda in which Monday included reading, language arts, math, and art; Tuesday was much the same with a little computer work and time outside with the dogs; and so it went.

What did I learn here? There is a difference between being programmed to do something a certain way every day verses scheduling a list of chosen activities.

Cole asked what his daily "Special" was going to be every day for three weeks after we pulled him out of school. A Special is an activity outside of normal classwork such as Library, gym, computer, art, and music. It's taken Cole about four months to realize that if he wants to make a poster or work on a drawing rather than doing his math at any given time, he can. If he wants to go hang out in his den and dig on some music while playing with his Army men, that's great. Cole is allowed to go outside to play with the dogs at any point in the day. He knows when he's antsy and needing to burn some energy.

In fact, as long as Cole completes a certain amount of reading, writing, and math each week, he can do as he pleases most of the day. We are all learning that Cole knows more of what he needs than anyone (including US). That's not to say he doesn't need some direction; he is only 11, but my point is that given a learning environment rich in resources, he will take advantage of it - and not just the art and music and time with the dog - though all of those are wonderful learning experiences. Two weeks ago, Cole asked if instead of looking up spelling words in the dictionary if I would consider making a crossword for each list. !!! Brilliant! Cole still learns the definition of the words and gets to work a puzzle in figuring it out. He never complains about this weekly task as he has ultimate buy-in; it was his idea!

So, what did we learn from this experience? In the most basic terms, I learned that even unschooling can exist within a scheduled environment (and I like it that way too! ha ha ha - no surprise there.), and Cole has found there are days when there's nothing you can do but set aside the worksheets and the pencils and the schedule to simply hang with the dogs, listen to some tunes, and think. Cole and I are finding our brains work so much more effectively and creatively if we allow our tasks to mirror our moods and to stop worrying so much about checking off the list; rather, we use the list as a map in the event we feel lost.

We are truly independent adventurers in our own journey in learning!

The Less-Homework Revolution

This was on the Today Show today and is also posted on Parenting.com.

As most of you know, the ridiculous amount of homework and in-class busy work Cole was required to do was one of the many reasons we opted to homeschool.

For those parents not in a position to homeschool, this article provides compassion and guidance in addressing the homework problem experienced by most publicly and privately educated children (and their parents) in the US today.
.........................................................................................
The Less-Homework Revolution
How fed-up parents are changing the way schools think -- and how you can, too

By Nancy Kalish, Parenting

I used to be extremely pro-homework. In fact, I once wrote an article for this very magazine telling readers how to get kids to stop whining and knuckle down to work. Back then, I could afford to be smug: My second-grader was happily zooming through her ten minutes a night. But a few years later, Allison started coming home with four hours of homework each night, and everything changed. Now there was not only whining but also begging, yelling, and crying -- sometimes from both of us. The worst part: hearing my previously enthusiastic learner repeatedly swear how much she hated school.

I'd always assumed homework was essential. But when I finally looked into the research about it, I was floored to find there's little to support homework -- especially in vast quantities. While not every child gets too much, many kids are now overloaded as early as kindergarten. I was appalled (I even co-wrote a book about it, The Case Against Homework), so you can bet that this time around, you won't be getting any "how to be a good homework cop" tips from me.

Instead, I'm here to call you to action. You can change things for your child -- even for the whole school. There are more and more frustrated parents and wised-up schools around the country, so why should your child keep suffering through hours of work? A less-homework revolution is brewing, and you can join it.

taking back family time

Like me, Christine Hendricks, a mother of three in Glenrock, WY, had always believed in homework. Then her daughter, Maddie, entered elementary school. "By the fourth grade, she had so much, there was no time for after-school activities, playing, or simply enjoying our evenings together. We were always stressed, and I knew many other families were also miserable." Hendricks decided things had to change -- and she had a unique advantage: She's the principal of Glenrock's Grant Elementary School. Together with her teachers, she looked into the research and found what I did: Homework's not what it's cracked up to be. "We decided to do an experiment and eliminate most homework," she says. The one exception: occasional studying for a test. "This is only our second year without it, but there have been no backslides in the classroom or in test scores," says Hendricks. "Parents say their kids enjoy reading again because there's no pressure. In fact, there have been no negative effects whatsoever. And there's much less stress at our house, too." We're not all in a position to fast-track a solution as Hendricks did, but we still have power.

In Toronto, Frank Bruni decided to do something when a pediatrician told him that his 13-year-old son should exercise more. Says Bruni, "I thought to myself, 'And when would he do that?' " So Bruni organized other parents and lobbied the Toronto School District to hold public meetings, presenting the research behind homework. The result is a new policy that affects more than 300,000 kids, limiting homework to reading in elementary school, eliminating holiday homework, and stating the value of family time. Canada's education minister now wants all the country's school boards to make sure students aren't being overloaded. "It's so gratifying to know that this year, Toronto's kids are going to have a life," says Bruni. "It shows you just how much parents can do when they try."

why it's worth a fight

Homework is such an established part of education, it's hard to believe it's not all that beneficial, especially in large quantities. But the truth is, a recent Duke University review of numerous studies found almost no correlation between homework and long-term achievement in elementary school, and only a moderate correlation in middle school. "More is not better," says Harris Cooper, Ph.D., a professor of psychology and neuroscience who conducted the review. In fact, according to guidelines endorsed by the National Education Association, teachers should assign no more than ten minutes per grade level per night (that's ten minutes total for a first-grader, 30 minutes for a third-grader).

Pile on more and it can backfire. "Most kids are simply developmentally unable to sit and learn for longer," says Cooper. Remember: Many have already been glued to their desks for seven hours, especially at schools that have cut gym, recess, art, and music to cram in more instructional time. If you add on two hours of homework each night, these children are working a 45-hour week. Some argue that we need to toughen kids up for high school, college, and the workforce. But there are other ways to teach responsibility, such as the chores that parents often have to let slide because of studying.

And too much homework is actually sapping our children's strength, natural curiosity, and love of learning. "Kids are developing more school-related stomachaches, headaches, sleep problems, and depression than ever before," says William Crain, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the City College of New York and author of Reclaiming Childhood: Letting Children Be Children in Our Achievement-Oriented Society. "We're seeing kids who are burned out by fourth grade. Soon, it will be by second grade." Too much homework also means that kids miss out on active playtime, essential for learning social skills, proper brain development, and warding off childhood obesity.

All this work doesn't even make educational sense. "It's counterintuitive, but more practice or the wrong kind of practice doesn't necessarily make perfect," says Kylene Beers, president of the National Council of Teachers of English and author of When Kids Can't Read, What Teachers Can Do. For example, children are able to memorize long lists of spelling words -- but many will misspell them the following week.

"Instead, they should spend the time reading and writing, and practicing words that are at the appropriate level for each child," says Beers. According to the U.S. Department of Education, most often a math teacher can tell after checking five algebraic equations whether a student has understood the necessary concepts. Even more important, whether it's algebra or addition, five problems is enough to tell if a student doesn't understand a concept. Practicing dozens of homework problems incorrectly only cements the wrong method into his brain. Naturally, some kids need more practice before math skills become automatic, but pages of problems rarely help the whole class. In addition, teachers who assign large numbers of problems are often unable to do anything more than spot-check homework. That means errors are missed -- and some children truly are left behind.

So why are schools ignoring all these guidelines? "Many teachers are under greater pressure than ever before to assign more homework," says Beers. "Some of it comes from parents, some from the administration and the desire for high scores on standardized tests." And here's a surprise: Your child's teachers have probably never taken a course that covers what constitutes good or bad homework, how much to give, and the research behind it. "I'm disappointed to admit that colleges of education simply don't offer specific training in homework," says Beers. Cooper adds, "Teachers are winging it."

4 waste-of-time assignments

typical assignment: Keep a reading log
why it's busywork: Writing down the title is one thing; adding on the author, publisher, and other info turns reading into a tedious activity. Rather, let kids write a line or two about why they liked or didn't like the book. The time would also be better spent reading another book.

typical assignment: Play an "unscramble the word" spelling game
why it's busywork: If a child sees a spelling word with the letters scrambled, he could end up remembering it that way, says National Council of Teachers of English president Kylene Beers.

typical assignment: Answer the questions at the end of the chapter
why it's busywork: This can encourage kids to "skim and scan," hunting for answers and ignoring other content. The exception is questions that help kids infer meaning.

typical assignment: Create a diorama/model/game board/anything that requires craft supplies and a glue gun
why it's busywork: Such "fun" projects usually involve a frantic trip to the crafts store, expensive supplies, too much parent participation -- and too little educational value to justify the number of hours they take (with the possible exception of science-fair projects). If it's all about how it looks, it's probably not worth it.

the start of something big

A revolution has to begin somewhere, and as Christine Hendricks, the Wyoming principal and mom, proves, that somewhere isn't only on the coasts or in big cities. It's in communities and schools all over the country.

After teaching math for several years at South Valley Middle School in Liberty, MO, Joel Wazac realized that his students were rarely finishing the reams of problems he sent home. So he and other math teachers decided to eliminate homework and concentrate on making class lessons more engaging. "I had more time for planning when I wasn't grading thousands of problems each night," says Wazac. "And when a student didn't understand something, instead of a parent trying to puzzle it out, I was right there to help him." The result: Grades went up and the school's standardized math test scores are the highest they've ever been.

In some cases, entire schools, such as Mason-Rice Elementary in Newton, MA, have limited homework according to the "ten-minute rule." The Raymond Park Middle School in Indianapolis has a written policy instructing teachers to "assign homework only when you feel the assignment is valuable. A night off is better than homework which serves no worthwhile purpose." Others, such as Oak Knoll Elementary in Menlo Park, CA, are eliminating elementary school homework altogether. If these schools can do it, why can't yours?

Many parents are the ones leading the fight against homework overload…and winning. In Danville, CA, Kerry Dickinson, a mother of two, spearheaded the effort by organizing more than 100 parents to convince the local school district to revise its homework policy. The policy still exceeds the "ten minutes per grade" rule, but it discourages weekend and holiday homework and stresses the value of family time. "Is it perfect? Not even close," says Dickinson, who has a teaching credential herself. "But it's progress." You may feel more comfortable starting smaller -- but that's a great way to get the revolution brewing in your community. Aubrey King is a mom who found that teachers can be more responsive (and sympathetic) than you might think. "Normally, we have no time for after-school activities, the park, or even getting an ice cream cone," says King, the Colorado Springs mother of a third- and a sixth-grader, as well as three younger children. But when one child's homework interfered with the family's preparations for Christmas, it was the last straw. King e-mailed the teacher, who promptly eliminated all assignments for the entire class until after winter break.

Another step in the right direction: Krisi Repp of Gray Summit, MO, sent each of her three children's teachers a letter detailing her family's already busy schedule and gently informing them that homework was interfering with sleep, exercise, dinner, church, and precious time together. "Several teachers commented 'I never thought about that' or 'You're right,'" Repp reports. "Many don't have school-age children yet themselves. They're not going to know any better unless we speak out."

Joining the revolution

Fewer than 60 percent of schools have official homework policies, which means that it might be a lot more negotiable than you think. Keep your approach nonconfrontational and cooperative, and you have a good chance of success.

If your child has too much homework tonight... stop the suffering with a note. If he's been working longer than he can bear, don't push him further. It'll only make him dislike homework more. Instead, write a note to the teacher on the homework, saying that Jonathan tried but couldn't complete the assignment and that you felt it was more important that he get a good night's sleep. There usually are no negative consequences.

If homework overload is a continuing problem... speak up. E-mail the teacher to request a meeting, and ask how long she expects her assignments to take. Compare that to the ten-minutes-per-grade-level guideline and how long it actually takes your child. Then when you meet, try not to be accusatory ("Your homework is killing my child!") but to enlist the teacher as an ally ("Lucy can't concentrate for more than X minutes each night. After that, she starts to hate the work, and the learning stops"). Together, perhaps you can decide that your child will tackle reading first, do only five math problems, and stop once she's reached her limit. Another strategy: Describe a typical night for your family. This might be enough to help the teacher realize there isn't enough time (for any kid) to finish all of the assignments.

If homework overload is a widespread problem at school... find strength in numbers. If your child is miserable, chances are other kids in his class are, too. Ask the other parents to e-mail the teacher or approach the principal with you. Sometimes that's all it takes. If that doesn't work, you might want to organize a homework forum at your school or speak before the school board, with the goal of establishing a reasonable homework policy. Ask parents to fill out a survey first so you have documentation of how much homework the children are doing.

Click here for a sample one from The Case Against Homework. Another great site, StopHomework.com, is run by less-homework advocate Sara Bennett; it has the latest research and can give you personal advice for making change.

Nancy Kalish is the coauthor, with Sara Bennett, of The Case Against Homework: How Homework Is Hurting Children and What Parents Can Do About It.

This Stuff Really Works

We're now about four months into our homeschooling experience, and the rhythm and benefits came much sooner than I ever expected!

For instance, Sample A. Cole (above), woke up with nightmares at 4am from playing video games he got for Christmas last night that he, no doubt, should not be playing. Doug and I were, of course, aware of the fact that these mature combat games would most likely prolong Cole's need to have someone assist him in falling asleep and cause nightmares and sleepless nights for everyone. However, we had a plan.

So, the Burrito woke up at 4am and dragged me out of bed and back to his to snuggle up and fall asleep a bit more securely. Even at the early hour, as we tried to get comfortable, Cole had what I'm now calling a "stretch" moment (when Cole finds the solution to a problem he is experiencing without adult influence or suggestion). To my delight, he asked me to "take away" a couple of his new combat video games until he is older and can handle the content more appropriately. Cole heard of our friend Josh's son having similar issues from a movie scene he saw on accident just this week, but I really thought the draw of the newness and obvious leniency we were providing in allowing him to play the games would keep him into them for quite a while if not until he eventually tired of them. Instead, Cole had been examining his own behavior, feelings, and possible influences in what was going on and made a sound, mature decision in addressing the issue at hand. WoO HoO!

It was a tough situation for all of us. Doug and I knew what the initial result in playing the games would be (nightmares and little sleep for us all), but we also knew that if we tried to tell Cole he couldn't play the games, he'd simply play them at his friends' houses as he's done in the past. Who could blame the kid? We really didn't want to set him up with an unrealistic expectation that would invariably lead him to being dishonest with us. Too tangled a web. Trust the process! Cole's a smart kid, and he's been doing a lot of self-discovery lately, albeit unbeknownst to him. : ) His decision to put aside the new and borderline-taboo games he'd been allowed to play is big! This was a moment you read about in homeschooling literature that seems pure fantasy until it actually happens. I'm so tired right now; I wonder if it actually happened. LOL...kidding.

This type of thinking reflects some of the methodology we've picked up for parenting through homeschooling. The benefits for Cole seem pretty obvious to me. We all have to admit that a lesson learned through experience and through one's own choice is the most resoundingly learned sort, and as Cole finds resolutions for problems himself that are successful, the more confidence he'll have in his own decision making capabilities and in his ability to manage his way through obstacles. Of course, there are limits to what we'll allow him to experience as much as we can, but in this instance, I'm pleased we made the choice we did. I don't think there's any permanent damage done, and Cole will find something else to occupy his imagination soon enough.

Even beyond this great learning experience, due to the fact that I work from home and Cole is homeschooled, we didn't have to stress out about the fact that we were awake at 4am. Cole and I eventually got out of bed as we couldn't fall back to sleep and went out to the living and turned on Out of Africa. Cole is fascinated by the cultural and technological differences between then and now, and the story really is captivating. We fed the dogs and had breakfast and chatted until he finally passed out. Of course, I've been working since then, but I'll call it a day very early today. Maybe we'll go catch a matinee - a comedy!?

This homeschooling stuff really works for us. : )

Busy Little Bees

It is not enough to be busy...the question is 'what are we busy about'?
Henry David Thoreau

What are our children actually learning in school?

I've been doing a lot of thinking on this lately, and these are my thoughts.

For starters, even very young kids (I'm talking Kindergarten here) are required to conduct themselves in a manner most adults would find challenging. The institution of the school is institutionalized alright! Try prison-like. Each subsequent year seems to find shorter recesses (if recess is permitted at all - some Dallas elementary schools I know of have done away with it completely), no-talking restrictions in the cafeteria during a shrinking lunch hour - oh, I mean 20 minutes, restroom privileges suspended, and on it goes.

Many reasons exist for the changes in education over the past decade and almost all of them are well-intentioned. However, no matter the end, our schools and our kids are suffering.

Q: So, what's changed since we were kids?
A: A heck of a lot.

In 1999, the Columbine High School massacre, motivated frightened parents to demand No Tolerance rules towards violent acts, cliques, and bullying within our schools. Who could blame them? Millions of parents watched in horror as students fled the high school to escape the carnage occurring within its doors. We saw the interviews, saw the fear on the faces of students, teachers, and parents affected, and weren't we all affected? We mourned the tragic and unimaginable death of 12 Columbine students and one teacher. We hugged our kids tight and worried as we sent them off to school in the morning. Subsequent acts of violence within or around our schools have dominated news media and remain a growing concern in many cities around the Nation. Increased security and No Tolerance rules have changed the atmosphere of enrichment, creativity, and fun in schools to one more akin of a penitentiary.

Add to this, the increasing desire of parents and educators to close the disparity between the privileged and under-privileged combined with the need for inclusively where children are concerned pushed legislators towards so-called Reform. Good intentions to be sure, but the results are less than brilliant. The No Child Left Behind Act of 2001 calls for increased accountability from States to education all children to a specified standard. And how is this measured and reinforced? You guessed it - standardized testing tied to State and Federal funding. This not only puts the focus on these test results but also limits where funds are spent within schools (for instance, many gifted and/or remedial programs as well as the arts have been cut out in favor of a more standard level and course of study).

The Act reduces eduction to a primary goal of preparing students for mandatory state testing. I went to parent orientation at the beginning of this school year, and the 5th grade teachers spent at least half of their allotted time discussing the importance of attendance during testing, their expectations of the students and parents during the week of testing (get rest, eat a healthy breakfast, take vitamins - uh...like these things aren't important every day?), and how they would handle make-up testing for students who dare to get sick during the original test week.

Criticism of standardized testing aside (and believe me - there are criticisms), the Act motivated the State of Missouri to improve its testing scores...and how did they do this? By lowering testing standards.

"Teaching to the test" is the basis for curriculum in the US and begs the question what is the definition of education today?

Mine certainly does not fit into the current box we call public education in the United States. I could go on and on about the reasons why I feel our education system is failing on so many levels. Where is the excitement and fun in learning? Is learning even occurring?

Finally, after years of discussion and research, we hit our limit of %*&! this year and have taken Cole out of school. We are in Week Two of the new and exciting endeavor of home school, and things are going GREAT.

Stay tuned...

Education–noun
1. the act or process of imparting or acquiring general knowledge, developing the powers of reasoning and judgment, and generally of preparing oneself or others intellectually for mature life. Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)